Since I celebrated my 26th birthday a few weeks ago, I thought I would share some writing and life lessons I’ve learned throughout the years.
About a month ago, I read an article by Michelle Schroeder-Gardner over at Making Sense of Cents called 29 Money and Life Lessons I’ve Learned. She blogs about personal finance and I have been following her for years. There has just been so much that I have learned when it comes to writing and it inspired me to write this post, with my own twist of course.
I love my life the way it is, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t have goals on how to improve my life. It also doesn’t mean that I have done everything right. I have definitely made some mistakes, but I have also made some good decisions, too.
Looking back this week has made me realize how valuable those lessons can be and that I would not be who I am today if I had not had those experiences.
So, here goes, the 26 most important writing and life lessons I’ve learned. Every year, I plan on updating this post with a new lesson. I hope they help you, and if you have any to add, feel free to post them in the comments.
1. Charge your worth
When I first started freelancing, I opened accounts on several content platforms and made a whopping $573 the first year. While this may seem like a decent amount, I was writing five to ten articles a week. It equaled out to about only $2 an hour! I have to admit, I did get some very valuable experience, but if I had charged anywhere near the industry standard, I would have made a comfortable full-time salary.
2. Don’t be lazy
There are so many things you can do with your time other than just sit in front of the television. Go for a walk, clean the house, listen to a podcast, read a book. Imagine how much more productive you could be if you used your time discovering your passions.
3. Don’t be a workaholic
On the other side of that coin, don’t work all the time. Set aside time for yourself, for your family, and for your friends. As a writer, I know it can be tempting to try to get some writing in every spare minute of the day. I am guilty of doing that sometimes, but then I remind myself that my kids are only going to be little once. Yes, it is important for them to see me working towards something that I love, but it is also important for them to see me put work down and read a book or do a puzzle with them.
4. Never compare your beginning to someone else’s middle
We are all on this path we call life, but we are all at a different stage. It does us no good to compare our beginning (whether it is blogging, author career, weight loss, you name it) to someone else’s middle. Everyone’s path is going to be a little different. In fact, it really doesn’t do us any good to compare your middle to someone else’s middle either. The point is that you are doing your best and always trying to improve yourself.
5. Set goals and break them down
I am a big believer in having big dreams, but I also know that if you don’t write those dreams down and break them up into achievable goals, they will stay dreams forever and never become reality. Write your dreams down, then break them into the steps you need to take in order to reach those dreams. Divide them into 10-year goals, 5 years, 1 year, quarterly, monthly, weekly, and daily goals. This allows you to build a plan to achieve your dreams through actionable tasks.
6. Be positive
There is this saying of “What goes around, comes around.” If you go around with a frown on your face and a negative attitude, that is also what you will receive. Things will seem to never go your way. However, if you think about the good things in your life, you are more likely to find a solution to the things that are troubling you. There really is a good side to everything.
7. Be grateful
A lot of very successful people swear by writing down three things that you are grateful for each day. I have started to do this over the last year, and I can tell you that even on the roughest days I can still identify three things that I am grateful for every night. By doing this, I feel better and am much more ready to get up the next morning. I write these down in a journal, but you can put them wherever makes sense to you.
8. Keep a journal
Another thing that I have started to do over the last year is write in a journal before going to bed. Taking the ten or fifteen minutes to reflect every day has really helped me become a better person. I am able to work through my feelings without bottling them up and one day have them explode all over the place. Writing can be a lonely gig (not including all those characters you talk to), but writing in a journal can be good for your soul.
9. Learn something new every day
We all have something that we can share with the world, but everyone also has something they can share with us. Take the time to learn something new every day. This doesn’t necessarily mean you have to go back to school (which you totally can by the way), it just means that you should keep your mind active. Learn a new word and use it throughout the day. Learn how to sew or cook a new meal. Listen to a podcast or read a book. Imagine how much farther you could get in life if you were continuously learning something new
10. Your kids will only be little once
One thing that has been nagging me recently in the back of my brain, is that my kids are growing up so fast and I’m still stuck to my computer screen during the day. I want them to see me work towards something that I love, but I also want them to have memories of their mom who was there for them. So, when it is just the three of us at home, I try to only work before they wake up and during nap/quiet time. My to-do list never grows any shorter, but they will only be this little for a little while longer, and then they won’t need me to get them that ten-thousandth snack or button their pirate costume. For me, it is worth it to wait a little longer on my to-do list if it means I get to experience them being this little.
11. Read voraciously
We talk about this one a lot. You can’t be a good writer without being a good reader. And really, you can’t be a good thinker without being a good reader. Reading introduces you to new ideas that you may not otherwise come across in your physical interactions. Plus, who wouldn’t want to visit all those wonderful places that exist solely between the covers of books?
12. Get moving
Writing is a very sedentary job, but humans were never meant to sit in an uncomfortable position in front of a computer screen all day. It is not healthy and can lead to some serious health issues if we don’t take the time to move around and get our blood flowing. I make it a point to go outside every day. The sun does wonders for my mood and recharges my brain, so I am able to be so much more productive by the time I go sit back down. Some days I take a walk, others I pack a few snacks and some water and head to the park with my kids. On days where it is raining, or maybe my kids are taking a nap, I will put some headphones in and blare the music while I clean the house. Either way, I get up, get moving, and get my blood flowing.
13. Eat right
In addition to getting active, eating right is also imperative to living a healthy lifestyle as a writer. It is so easy to sit there and write while you sip on that soda or snack on those chips. However, that doesn’t mean it is the healthy thing to do. Fill your pantry with healthy snacks like fruits and nuts and drink lots of water.
14. Help others
They say that one of the best ways to be successful in business is to help others. And believe it or not, writing is a business. Help others and you will be more successful, but don’t just do it to further yourself, do it because it is the right thing to do.
15. Just jump
Instead of spending hours, days, weeks, months, even years planning and thinking about what you are going to do, just do it. I can’t help but think that if I had taken the leap years ago to start writing my book, how much farther along this indie-publishing path would I be? Prepare yourself and then just do it.
16. Do your research
Even though I do believe just going for your dreams can be a good thing, it is also important to know what to expect before jumping in. Know how much time, energy, and money it will cost you. What is your ROI? How will it affect you and those that surround you? What is the best case scenario? The worst? Know the facts, and if you are satisfied with the results, then jump in.
17. Don’t believe everything you are told
You know the saying you can’t believe everything you read on the internet? Well, the same is true for what people tell you in person. They may mean well, or they may not, but the reality is that you are the one who will have to deal with the consequences. I’m not saying don’t listen to those people, I’m saying take it with a grain of salt and make your own decisions. Don’t just do something because somebody told you it was the best thing to do.
18. A college degree doesn’t guarantee a job
All throughout high school and college, I kept hearing, “Just get the degree and the job will come. You will be able to pay off your student loans and make a better life for yourself.” They made it sound so easy, and I fell for it. I spent the time, money, and energy, and I got the degree. Then, when I graduated, I couldn’t find a job ANYWHERE. Now, years later, I have learned that having the degree can help you get a better paying job, but it will not guarantee the job.
19. A good financial situation can relieve a lot of stress
I know money isn’t everything, but having enough money to make ends meet and build a savings fund can relieve a significant amount of stress. Budget and work towards your financial goals so you can live, not work to live.
20. Learn to say no
When I first started as a freelancer, I would take any job I could get. While this helped bring in a little money at first, I lacked a focus that could have gotten me much higher paying gigs. Not every job will be right for you. Take on the ones that will help you progress in your business, and leave the other ones to somebody else.
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21. Be open to new things
The people who are set in their ways are the ones who don’t get anywhere. Be open to new ideas and expand your horizons.
22. Find balance
Balance is a funny thing. There really isn’t a way to equally balance everything on your plate, but making sure that the big components are always there is what matters. Check out this post about balancing all your self-publishing to-dos.
23. Less is more
As I have gotten older, I have grown to hate clutter. When I was a kid, I loved all 236 of my stuffed animals. My room was full of stuff. Now, a lot of that stuff just gets in the way. I still like to have pretty things in my house, just fewer of them. When I write, I like to have a clutter-free workspace. There really is something to be said of the effect minimalism has on your creativity and productivity.
24. Be afraid
It is okay to be afraid. In fact, the thing you are afraid of is often the very thing you need to go after. Courage is not acting in the absence of fear, it is acting despite and because of the fear. I was afraid to start putting my writing out there for all to see. What if people ignored what I had to say, or worse, criticized it? I was afraid to become a mom. What if I couldn’t be what my kids needed? But, you see? I did both. Now, I have been a mom for four years and am about to publish my first book. I do the best that I can to be the best that I can be, and I am okay with that. It just pushes me to always try to do better.
25. Write everyday
I know I talk a lot about the importance of writing every day. This does not mean you have to write 2,000 words every day on your WIP. It means that you should write SOMETHING every day that will keep your writer’s mind active. On the days you don’t write on your WIP, write a journal entry, flesh out one of your characters, do some editing on a previous WIP. Doing something writing-related every day will enable you to tap into your muse and reach your writing goals that much easier.
26. “The first draft of anything is shit.”
One of Hemingway’s most famous quotes is entirely true. Just get your words down on paper. That’s the hard part. Allow your writing to suck, you can fix it all later. Don’t worry about dotting all your I’s and crossing all your T’s. Don’t worry about spelling or if a paragraph is awkward. All of that can be fixed in the editing process, but the editing process can never happen if there are no words to edit. Even the most successful authors’ first drafts are shit, so don’t be embarrassed if yours are too.
Over To You
Hopefully, you found this helpful.
Next year, and every year after, I plan on adding another lesson to this list. In the meantime, feel free to leave a comment with and all writing and life lessons you may want to add.
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